I wanted to write about divorce and thought an appropriate title might be Suddenly Single. The Broadway/Movie Musical geek in me, shifts to Suddenly Seymour, the show stopper from Little Shop of Horrors. Does divorce connect to show tunes?
Some Fun Now
Like most fairy tales, the hero, Seymour, and the heroine, Audrey has a happily-ever-after ending. That is how their story ends. The producers left room for a sequel where we might find out if their lives embodied the lyrics in Somewhere That’s Green. Perfection from the pages of Better Homes and Gardens is comparable to Instagram reels today. For sure they’d be #relationship goals.
Happily ever after was the beginning of you and your Seymour. There was singing and dancing to Some Fun Now when things were going well. Now is the operative word. The fun may not last after the honeymoon ends. One of the reasons cited for the failure of some marriages is the fun ending. In Why Do People Get Divorced? 10 Reasons And Statistics, Michael Puskar states, “Having expectations that are difficult or even impossible to meet can put a strain on your relationship. What you see as the “perfect” partner is heavily influenced by outside forces like the media (such as romantic movies or TV shows), and while they might seem innocent at first glance, they are still destructive.”
According to Sofia Bolanas in 15 Common Causes of Divorce, “It’s especially unhealthy in marriages where a person expects their spouse to be the reason for their joy and happiness. It puts a huge amount of pressure on the spouse to be ‘perfect’. Unrealistic expectations can also make a person feel that who they are just isn’t good enough for their spouse, leading to low self-esteem and even resentment.” Audrey seemed to pour all of her hopes and dreams into Seymour.
Down on Skid Row
Their tune later changes to Skid Row once the cares of life wear them down. Reasons for divorce range from 3 to 15. One of the six reasons from today.com to blame for divorce is money. Money in and of itself doesn’t cause divorce. Living in poverty as Audrey and Seymour did is incredibly stressful, and financial stressors can lead to fighting — which can result in divorce. Differences in how we spend or save money can also be incredibly difficult to navigate in a marriage. One person wants to shop at TJ Maxx, and the other, at Bergdorf Goodman. Seymour got in way over his head hoping never to be poor again.
Feed Me
As individuals, they cry out Feed Me, due to prioritizing things other than each other. Unbeknownst to Audrey 1, Audrey 2 had Seymour’s ear tempting him to make life-altering decisions that would affect the Krelborn’s (Seymour’s last name) going forward. The realization that one’s spouse has different values/morals made the 13 most common reasons for divorce list from itsovereasy.com. Audrey 1 probably walked down the aisle anyway, justifying what he did. In the director’s cut of the 1986 film and the original 1960 cult classic, she even sacrificed herself to continue his rise to fame and fortune. This once-loving couple found themselves in a Little Shop of Horrors instead of a home like the one in Somewhere That’s Green.
Suddenly Single
If there were ever a modern remake of this comedy/musical/horror film, one would hope that Audrey wouldn’t just say “sure” about the decisions Seymour made. She would resist immersing herself in fantasy and see red flags instead of pastel pink. Seymour was not a bad guy and I am not saying that he and Audrey shouldn’t marry. Counseling is warranted for both of them. Then Audrey can make an informed decision about matrimony. If the nuptials proceed, it is up to her to determine if she can live with things that go unchanged.
Divorce Advice and Help for Women is available at www.womansdivorce.com. As a divorced woman, can you relate to Audrey? Feel free to share in the comments.